Being Chuck

This morning, Tim Couch gave some new perspective to a familiar passage of scripture. He would tell you he got the info from somewhere else, and that it’s not his, but he put the sermon together. The credit for this post goes to him…

Anyway, go back and reread John 21:15-18. The story of Jesus restoring Peter. We (the church) tend to focus on the fact that Jesus asked Peter three times (in relation to the three denials by Peter of Jesus), but I’m not sure that’s the point.

Jesus asked Peter, “Do you love me?”

But our language is lacking when it comes to certain words… LOVE being one. When Jesus asked this question the word he used (in the Greek) is agapao (root = agape). But when Peter answers each time, he uses the word phileo. Both mean love, but they are different kinds.

Here are a couple of definitions:

Agape = to be fond of, to love dearly; to love, to be full of good-will, to have a preference for, regard the welfare of: . . . to take pleasure in the thing, prize it above other things, be unwilling to abandon it or do without it; a spontaneous feeling which impels to self-giving, the weak sense to be satisfied, to receive, to greet, to honor, or more inwardly, to seek after; to have love for someone or something, based on sincere appreciation and high regard.

Phileo = friendship, to be friendly to one; phileo more nearly represents tender affection; To love; to be friendly to one, to treat somebody as one of one’s own people; to have love or affection for someone or something based on association; love, have affection for, like.

If you haven’t already had the “AHA!” moment, it’s okay. I will continue.

So, the difference is similar to this:

agape = real love… “I would die for you.” It is a strong, intense, and deep bond.

phileo = “I love you man.” It’s a simple friendship. A bond of commonality.

So Jesus basically asks Peter (I’m paraphrasing here), “Peter, do you love me more than life itself? Would you go to the ends of the earth and die for me?”

And Peter’s response is, “Come on Jesus, we’re buds. You know how I feel.”

Total cop out.

So Jesus asks again, “Peter, do you love me more than life itself? Would you go to the ends of the earth and die for me?”

And Peter responds a second time, “Jesus, man, you know how I feel. We’re tight!”

At this point, most of us would get angry or fed up.

I know I would. If I asked someone who said they had my back, someone I was close to a question like that, and their response was similar to Peter’s, I’d be finding a new friend. That’s completely lame.

But I’m definitely not Jesus.

Jesus asks Peter again, but this time in a simpler way. “Peter, we’re brothers, we’re tight, right?”

And Peter replies, “Yeah man, we’re tight.”

And this is just one of those things that make Jesus so unbelievable. He was asking for everything Peter had. All of it. Every last bit.

But Peter wasn’t ready, even though previously he had said he was. So Jesus, instead of finding someone else “on which He could build His church,” met Peter where he was.

He asked Peter to step across the line. But Peter wasn’t ready, so Jesus met Him on the other side.

I always had trouble with this story. Jesus asking Peter three times. “Oops, that just happens to be the number of times you denied me isn’t it?” [include Dr. Evil pinky finger to mouth gesture here]

It always seemed a little harsh to me. (By the way, Jesus, if He chose to do that, had every right to.) But I don’t think that was the point.

So what is the point?

Restoration. Redemption.

A simple way to let a friend know that even though he couldn’t hack it, he wouldn’t be cut off.

Do I have grace like that?